Dialogue participants share their stories
Race study circles: Surprise, respect, some dropouts
by
Candy Bowen
June 4, 2008
|
The Florida Times-Union
|
Jacksonville, Florida
More than 450 people recently gathered for dinner at the Bethelite Conference Center in Arlington to have a conversation - rather several conversations - about racial relations.
In a shortened version of Project Breakthrough's Study Circles (a series of five-week forums for individuals to engage in open and honest talks on racism and race relations), Dinner With A Purpose brought hundreds of new and seasoned participants back to the discussion tables to whet appetites for more dialogue.
The event was one of the elements in the collaborative Project Breakthrough: A Community Effort to Change The Story of Race. It's a multidimensional, two-year partnership by the Jacksonville Human Rights Commission, One Jax and the Community Foundation of Jacksonville to eliminate racial and ethnic inequities in Jacksonville.
Study Circles are two-hour weekly forums with eight to 14 individuals held at various venues throughout the city. Participants of various backgrounds and ethnicities are encouraged by a facilitator to engage in a respectful, honest exchange to achieve better understanding of different cultures.
At the event, groups of past participants and the public were invited for a preview of what goes on during the regular sessions. With Round One of the Study Circles' five-week sessions recently ended, here are thoughts from participants about their experiences:
Laura Lane
Laura Lane remembers it being the second or third session of her Study Circle group when she thought people put aside their "politically correct" responses and shared their innermost feelings.
The topic was about white privilege, and the group was discussing an article they'd read by a University of Texas professor who talked about the social connections he had because he was white.
"That one got kind of heated when someone said that white men usually don't understand the concept," she said.
The facilitator stepped right in, though, because "they don't want someone to shut down," she said. "They might say, 'Can you tell us more about what you mean when you say such and such. ...'
"I took from that situation that it's all really tough stuff to talk about. If you take it all personally, it's not really truthful. I try not to take stuff personally; I try to stay aware of how I might sound but I don't really hold it against people when they say things."
For Lane, who is white and lives on the Northside, she's glad she took part in the experience. She said she originally signed up because her job allowed her to use the experience as professional development. Afterward she decided it was something she wanted to continue doing.
Her advice for potential participants: Be patient with yourself.
"The Study Circles can bring up some hard things to deal with - either with another person or yourself - and that's OK."
Jackson Blamo
Jackson Blamo said he felt he was experienced at the types of diversity discussions that would take place at the Study Circle. Retired from the Navy, he still works in a military-related function and had participated in similar groups as a part of military training.
"But this was a little bit different because with the military you know what you're going to get. This was different because of demographics," he said of his group that met downtown at City Hall.
Blamo's group started out with 10 participants. By the end, six remained, evenly divided between black and white members.
Blamo said he felt the experience taught him more about his surroundings than himself - specifically more about his neighborhood, an area with a history of being intolerant to people of color.
"I didn't know Oceanway had such a unique history," said Blamo, originally from Africa. "If I had, I don't know if I would have chosen to live there."
Helen Parnell
Jacksonville Beach resident Helen Parnell thought she knew quite a bit about race relations. She said she had spent the majority of her life thinking she had a closer bond with people of color than most Caucasians. So much so that she signed up to be a facilitator of the Study Circle immediately - before she had even attended a session.
As a high school student in Fort Myers during desegregration, her school made national news when Walter Cronkite reported on the riots that took place.
"I had grown up in the military, so integration was normal to me. I was not raised prejudiced. When the riots happened, I felt horrible."
So horrible that Parnell said she volunteered to head an interracial counsel at the school.
"I figured - having that experience in high school - I felt I could be a pretty good facilitator. I tend to do things like that. I tend to try to go to the top of the mound and then get cut down a few pegs."
Study Circle organizers told Parnell she should try being a participant first, before facilitating, and that's where the learning began.
"I have friends who are black and I thought I was a pretty good communicator but I found that there's still more communication I have to work on. A couple of things I said got some pretty surprising responses from black people."
Parnell said something she said got a surprising response from a white person in her group, too. After making a comment about white men, a white male participant told her she was stereotyping and backed away from the group.
"I don't know if that had been said by a black person, would he react different? I wish he had stayed in the group and we could have worked on it."
Parnell said she's glad she was urged to participate in the group before becoming a facilitator and has signed up again - as a participant. "I need to make sure I'm listening and to make sure I'm staying out of the way."
David Talbert
Westsider David Talbert is a white male who grew up in the Midwest and lived in New England. He joined the Navy at 17 and didn't see racism until he saw segregated restrooms in Virginia.
"I was raised in a family where you respected other people so I didn't grow up in a racist society," he said. "You don't really know much about people who are different from you and we also don't hang around people who are different from us."
It took the Study Circle process to show him how much he didn't see many of the problems others of different races experience. But the numbers, he said, from a Jacksonville Community Council Inc. race relations progress report, spoke for themselves. He was especially surprised at the higher unemployment rates for African-Americans and the fact that only 12.2 percent of whites were denied mortgages, as opposed to 28.2 percent of blacks in the same high-income category.
Talbert said the Study Circle experience opened his eyes and now he wants others to see. He is looking into getting a session or a similar program at his church and plans to bring others he knows the next round.
"We have these public service announcements against smoking, global warming and sexual disease. I think it's really important that we should have public service announcements against racism," he said. "I don't think we know how prejudiced we are."
Brenda Stewart
Brenda Stewart is a white female who lives on the Southside with her adult son. Her story was a little different because after participating in three previous Study Circles, she served as a facilitator this time. But she remembers her first experience with the concept.
"I didn't know what to expect, but I knew the solution to any problem that is race related lies in dialogue first. You have to get out there and then you can find out what you really have in common, and you find that you always have more in common than you have different."
Stewart grew up in Alabama during a time when schools were first desegregated. She saw how people where treated differently for no other reason than the color of their skin. She chose a career in human relations because of those experiences. She says she works hard at protecting companies from themselves by pointing out racist practices.
"I have built friendships with other races. I think it is so important to explore other cultures," she said. "As a white person, I can never fully comprehend what it is like to want to try to be white - just for a day."
While Stewart knows how she feels, she said her challenge as a first-time facilitator was remaining neutral "no matter what the conversation is or your own personal opinions. Otherwise trust breaks down and dialog stops flowing. ... And that is challenging sometimes - especially if you're passionate about a subject."
Ida Jackson
Ida Jackson met her Study Circle group at Highlands branch library on the Northside. She said she decided to join because she always had an interest in race relations. Of her group of 12, at 64, she said she thought she was the oldest person involved, but there was a good mix of ages and backgrounds.
"When I heard about the Study Circle, I had no preconceived ideas," said Jackson, who is African-American. "If it's something I want to do, I don't have to have a posse."
But since participating, she did tell friends so they could be included in what she said she gained: a stronger sense of objectivity.
"You get to a certain age and you feel you know it all. Then you get with others and you realize that my way is not the only way," she said. "It makes you open up and really look at yourself."
"It was an opportunity to meet people from every walk of life," she said. "That's the only way we are going to resolve anything."
To learn more about Project Breakthrough, visit www.onejax.org, call 354-1529 (354-1JAX) or call the Jacksonville Human Rights Commission at 630-4911.
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